This may be Classy, but I guess I prefer Assy.

Even though I’m in a mood right now, where I’m not that interested in clubbing, and have some other things I’d rather be spending my money on it is a very rare opportunity for me to be up on the West Palm Beach area with the time & space to pull off some afternoon clubbing. So I took the opportunity to check out Rachel’s. If you’ve seen my previous reviews, you know this isn’t a club for me. But sometimes you want to see something different.

I entered in at about 5pm. Some spaces were marked off for valet, but I was able to park on the side and there was no charge to park. No charge for admission. I walked in, and the first thing I noticed that it was dark. There is nothing as a brightly lit strip club, but this was exceptionally dark. Dark to the point where it was a bit difficult to see the girl on the stage. I came to the club with the thought of having some food as well, as I’ve heard that is the thing to do here. Unfortunately as soon as my eyes adjusted to the club, I realized I’m going to be bored as shit here shouldn’t waste much time. As you walk in there is a long bar across, and another long bar to your right. Only one bar seemed to be open at the time. There is a long stage in the middle of the club with two poles (with the dancers entering the stage via a descending stairwell from the 2nd level. Only one dancer on stage, but one could see that at a busier time both poles would be used. There is the stake house to your left, and above there is a membership level, that apparently you need to buy some membership to get access to (Dancer explained that to me and I said why in the hell would I want to do that).

There were about maybe 12 girls at this time. All appear to be white except for a slim Colombian. All the girls appear to be hunkered down with someone at the bar or at a table. So with the dimness of the club & the girls being locked up with people it really is difficult to check out the talent. But from what I can see there is nothing too interesting to me. I was told that as some people were still away for 4th of July (a week later at this point) it was a little slower than usual. Girls seem tall (FWIW) and about 75% have implants. I don’t see an ass worth mentioning in the place. Girls are wearing lingerie which is better than the night gowns I’d expected. Girls, seemed a bit older. To be expected on a day shift of course, but even for the time seemed a bit more mature. Not too old, but just markedly a bit more MILFish. The clientele also appear older, and seems to be exactly the types of dudes that you’d see in a Gentleman’s club in WPB. I ask for a beer at the bar and a 20 and get 12.50 back in change. Seems high for an afternoon. My dancer later tells me that its 2 for 1 at that time, so I’m owed another beer, but the bartender never told me anything about that. I sit at the bar and not too long after I get my beer before the Colombian comes to me. I think she may have been the only one not already sitting with someone, so I’m an easy mark. She speaks to me in English, and we go for sometime before I tell she’s having some struggles, so I tell her I speak Spanish. I’m not a talker, but she is and to fill space she does get me talking. Unfortunately she does do too much talking and gets into some boner poison conversations. At any rate, I’m bored with the club, thinking about my drive home and want to end up the review so I decide to go ahead and get dances. I expected we’d go back to some room for the dances, but it was a long bench area, which was only partially obscured by the stage. 2 other couples were back there and it was totally open so there is no chance of privacy (though in a place like Rachel’s I’m not sure that matters much). Mileage was better than I expected, but I didn’t expect much. Was effectively a lap dance with a little knee play on the stick but nothing more in that regard. I get two dances (she did throw in a little extra for the song that was playing when we got back there & didn’t count that as another dance). I gave her 3 20s for the two dances and she told me she had to go get change, I told here that was OK (I generally tip), and she seemed appreciative. After that, there was nothing else for me to do and nothing else for me to see, so I hit the road.