The History of the World, parts 1 & 2.

It's been a long while since I've visited this place but I was nearby with time to waste. I'd been going to this place once upon a time from the 1990's till maybe 5-8 years ago. (Golly, I'm old.) Once, this place was called the Office. The dancers were UArts students looking to pick up a few dollars. There was a dancer-painted mural inspired by Matisse, $3 beers, and no private dances. Then it became the Celebrity Room, maybe late 1990s, early 2000s. The Celebrity Room ran into legal problems when they tried to expand physically to the upstairs and cratered. Operating under the same name, but without any notable ownership, it became insane, like SF during the 1990's insane, where one could have ultimate fun with a dancer in open air. Then it became the Gold Club sometime in the early or mid naughts. And it was fun then. Good dances, with Billy and Frank coming to town on occasion. Then came 2008, and it went insane. Dancers wanted cash and Billy and Frank just seemed to be living in the joint. Then other things in life distracted me, they got busted (ages ago) and (on my various occasional visits) it seemed to have calmed down.

I was nearby today with time to spare. I popped in a little before 3. And who said hello but Tigra, who has been dancing there since forever (and before than Bumpers, for you real old farts). Tigra has always been a hottie and still is, with nipples that could probably poke your eye out. Time has been kind. She looks decades younger than she is. (If every woman her age looked like her, a lot of guys would just stay home.) Who else said "Hi" but the bartender, who used to dance, but has gone legitimate. Another dancer, I did not quite remember. It was that kind of awkward thing where one might say "Hi, do I know you? Have we had sex?", but instead you just act like you've found a long lost friend because you don't want to be a jerk if it is someone you once had a fling with but now can't remember.

I sat with Tigra, who chewed my ear off. I mean talking, not nibbling on my ear lobe. There's a lot to catch up on when you haven't seen someone in 5 years. I drank an overprice G&T. The gorgeous barkeep (wow, she looked awesome) then kept a water glass filled for me.