Thickness redefined...but is it worth your time

Arrived on a Saturday night.

The Scene: EI is located bang opposite a church parking lot, so say a few Hail Mary's before you proceed across the street. A BBQ sign flashes as you cautiously make your way into what appears to be a kitchen. However, upon further inspection, you realize that it is a room with a bar. $20 departs your pocket as you get accosted by a 50 year old bouncer.

Enter: You swing open the door to take in what can only bre described as " organized chaos". 3-4 ladies are vigorously shaking their beautiful plump rumps in a 8' by 12' space. Half a dozen dancers are socializing as a harried 65 year old man hoists delicious chicken wings and water bottles for sale. VIP seats are designated with paper signs indicating $10. As you stumble in delight to your chair( literally a chair, no IKEA influences here), you are swiftly accosted by a dancer who inquires in a matter-of-fact tone, " May i sit on your penis?"