So I went to Penthouse with...

So I went to Penthouse with two friends on a Wednesday night. Really good talent, even for a weeknight. We only saw one grosser looking girl, who had a potbelly and had no idea how to dance. She wiggled. The rest were not just hot, they were HOT. The problem with this place, and I'm not basing this on just one visit, is that there are so many regulars there that an "average Joe" like me can't get a dance to save my life. We were there for two hours. For the first 1.5 hours, nobody came to us. After a little bit, we took the proactive approach and started tipping $5s and $1s to girls on stage we liked. I even tried to give $5s and say "We're sitting over there, come over after..." We are young, attractive guys with pockets full of 20s...not sure what the problem was. The only thing I can think of is that just about every table and booth had girls sitting there, drinking with guys for a lonnnnnnnng time. I only go to the strip club about once per season (4x a year), so there is no way anyone would recognize me there. Sucks because we were all really, really ready for a dance. Finally, I just caught a stripper who was walking by and said, "are you available?" She said, "wanna go upstairs?" I was like, "YES" (thinking, thank God WTF...). I knew from this website and previous experience there (and from my buddy who goes about once a month) that lap dances were $25 each song. So, I got three songs. At the end, she said, "$110, plus I have to tip the bouncer $20." I was like WHOAH hang on, there was no hanky panky going on, and $110 divided by 3 songs is...$36.67 for each song. Weird number for a lap dance... hahahahah. So I didn't feel like arguing and getting thrown out, and I only had $90 (which I assumed would be enough since the bill should have been $75 plus tip...). So, I asked her if there was an ATM. She said there was a cash advance. I said, "That's not going to work." She said there was an ATM across the street. I wasn't about to walk across 8 Mile alone at 10 PM. She said, "Just borrow some from your friends and tip me on stage." I was like, "surrrrrrrre...." So, I sat back down and chilled. She came out and walked the floor, never bothered me. SHe knew she was ripping me off and never made any thing of it. I never paid her the extra. I don't know her name, but she had dark wavy hair and a big gap in her front teeth, but her body and face were SMOKING. Average tits. And, by the way, the lap dance was good. I ddin't request extras, nor did she offer, but plenty of chestal-region contact. Fun times. Just ask before you go up stairs, and check TUSCL for what the price is.