The LAST strip club in Little...

The LAST strip club in Little Rock. Apparently, some time ago, a local ordinance was passed banning them, and this club is grandfathered in.

Sketchy part of town. Small paved lot. Thugs hanging out in the parking lot in front of another business in the same strip mall. Big-ass bouncer outside the door on a barstool. Everything screamed out "Abandon Hope all ye that enter here."

Once inside, however, things looked like a generic strip club. Door charge was 10 bucks, but only because I arrived at 7:55 pm. At 8, it goes up to 20.

Club was clean and not smoky. The girl behind the counter taking the door charge was cute and friendly, and the bartenderess was gorgeous. She was the hottest thing in the club. My buddy drank beer, and it was reasonable. I drank water and all non-alco drinks were "free to the designated driver." Club was large and had 2 stages with 3 poles. I was there early enough that only one stage was in use. Dancers on stage ranged from fair to very hot, with one little Latina spinner being outstanding. Very little action at the tip rail. Expected tips appeared to be 3 bucks and no action in return, except the opportunity to chat with the girl. I asked the Latina about seeing me for a private dance, and she hinted that she would send another girl to me.

True to her word, a few minutes after she finished her sexy 2-song set, another sexy and beautiful girl came over, sat on my lap, her friend did the same to my buddy, and she asked if I was ready for VIP. I got the drill, and compared notes with my buddy, who was told the same thing: You can get a 10 minute stretch in a semi-private area, one-way contact for $100. Ouch. You could get a 30 minute, private area, 2-way contact for $250. Or, lastly, an hour, private area, full contact karate, bottle of champagne for $600. My buddy's girl promised "satisfaction guaranteed." My girl suggested the $250 was the best deal (duh!) and added "the more you tip, the more I do," then she winked, licked my ear and reached into my shirt to pinch my nipple. She was amazingly sexy. She let me look at the various areas. Semi-private was an open, darkened room with couches and a goon in the room. "Private" area was a small nook, couch, heavy curtain. She promised that the goon would not look in on us.