Tipping

Hi FONDL,

I would say it is a combination of custom and their need and how you feel about it.

Strippers that are making money doing laps don't go begging for tips do they? I would refrain unless I wanted her attention or she asked.

Well paid workmen not generally unless you can see they've gone above and beyond the call of duty and you can afford a tip that they will appreciate. Did the installers do something special? Can you afford a large tip that would make them feel good? The guy who sprays for bugs would again be a no unless you see he is doing something special or perhaps for holiday cheer and you have it to be generous with. An adult paper person definitely especially if his service is good. Depends on your relationship with the massage girl. The mailman not generally unless you have a good relationship and then it should be something other than money that is thoughtful. Probably no to the stripper unless I had extra money to spare which I really don't.

Anyway, for whatever it is worth those are my thoughts. Probably your gut is your best guide as well as your goal.

Happy tipping! :) BTW, please remember my culture and level of wealth is probably far different than yours so most of my ideas my not apply to you!!! Oh, and hope you aren't one of those nitwits who believes there is some universal American culture that all Americans share. That I just don't see at all. :)

Real simple for me. I pretty much go by the service provided, and level of pay. As an example, would I tip a plumber making more than soldiers, police, and fire fighters, no. Would I tip the guy that cleans the Jiffy Johns at like an outdoor concert, yes.

FONDL, you are in luck, Oprah has it all figured out.

http://www.oprah.com/omagazine/200212/om…

More seriously, having some experience with tipped professions you aren't expected to tip fee for service folks. If you are paying to have carpet installed, or the exterminator, or the movers you hire they are doing exactly what you paid for. If you have agreed on a price, you aren't obligated to tip. A Tip is generally reserved for someone who is doing a service that is not part of what you pay for. If you go to a resturant, you buy the food, you tip for the service. If you stay in a hotel, you pay for the room, you tip the bellhop and the cleaning ladies. That is my general rule. How much to tip depends on what they do for you and can vary by profession. In general I tend to tip based on time and effort required. The waiter waits on you and provides for all your needs for nearly an hour. He gets a big tip. The pizza delivery guy drops off your pizza along with dozens of others on a route, he gets a buck or two regardless of the bill.

AbbieNormal: I wish more people were like you and appreciated pizza delivery guys.....in my youth, I delivered pizza for about a year , and to this day, more than 25+ years later, I still have a chip on my shoulder about how many people did not tip. Hopefully, things have changed for the better. Funny thing, it was not the lower income, apartment dwellers that did not tip -- they actually tipped rather well -- it was generally the upper-middle class families in expensive homes that stiffed me. But I hear that is generally the case when it comes to restaurant tipping as well.....lower income service workers tip better than wealthly CEOs and pro athletes.

And for strippers, I commonly tip for well done lap dances.....I just hate the so-called "tip walk" which seems to be a common practice at some clubs. Begging is not attractive.

I agree that you should tip people like the pizza delivery person and the waitress - they make very little in salary. I also agree that you don't tip the Verizon guy who installs your fiber optic cable and phones and wireless computer setup (I actually offered him a tip because he did such a great job and was here all day but he said he wasn't allowed ot take it) or the plumber or electrician who fixes something for me or the furnace repair man who cleans my furnace - they all get paid fairly well for doing those jobs.

Where I have a problem is the people in between - eg. the truck driver and his helper who recently delivered my storage shed and set it up, or the guy who sweeps my chimney or the guys who empty the gutters on my house or the guy who delivers your new matress. Some of them seem to expect a tip and others don't. I once asked my ATF this question because her step-father has his own business as a carpet installer and she said that about half his customers tip him. She thinks you should tip everyone (she spent years as a waitress) who does a service for you - she tipped the delivery people who brought her noew sofa. She also runs her own massage business and most of her clients tip her even though they're paying a lot for a massage.

FONDL, I think you raise one of those interesting marginal cases. When you buy a sofa, and the delivery is free isn't that about the same as buying a meal and having it delivered? If you pay for delivery I'd tend to think not tipping is OK. If the delivery is free, I'd say possibly a tip is in order. If the guy delivering the sofa just plops it down in the living room, maybe no tip. If he helps you move the furniture and get it just where you want it, tip. So I'm also sometimes baffled, but generally go by the rule that if I hired you, you shouldn't expect to be tipped. If your boss has you doing something for me, then possibly a tip is in order.

I'd have tipped the truck driver and helper, not the chimney sweep or the gutter cleaner, and the mattress delivery guy I'd tip if he helped set up the new mattress in the bedroom, but not if he just brought it in the house and left. There are also a few areas where tipping is customary, like a barber or a cab driver, even though you are paying for the service specifically.

david120, what you usually find is that the best tippers are people who held a tipped job. I've been a delivery boy, a waiter, and a bartender. I tip well. Being a waiter is often described as the most expensive job you'll ever have. I don't know a single waiter or ex-waiter that tips less than 20%.

As for tipping on a lapdance, I'll do it if the dance was particularly enjoyable, but not as a rule.

I always thought the rule of thumb was you don't tip the owner of the business. You DON'T tip the barber or hair stylist if they own the shop, but you DO tip the others. The same could be said for massage therapists. If they own the business - don't tip, but do tip the other staff. That used to be case, but maybe things have changed.

My big problem area is the airport shuttle bus drivers - those they take you from the airport to the hotel or to the Hertz car rental lot. I feel like tipping, but from what I have observed, most people do not tip, except when they get help with a lot of bags.

I used to tip the customary 15% when eating out, a buck to the barber, etc.

However, when I went to work for the casinos in Mississippi as a blackjack dealer, I soon learned that 75% of my hourly wage came from "collective tokes". Since the majority of my 'living' basically came from tips, I started tipping better at restaurants, etc. I even started tipping people I never used to tip. I didn't realize until then, how a lot of people 'count' on tips for survival.

As far as clubs, I'm no 'tightwad' that's for sure. In fact, There are times I have over-tipped. I'm just a generous person is all.

AN, I was charged for delivery for the storage shed but not very much. I also bought it from a family business and I assumed, perhaps incorrectly, that the driver was part of the family. And I further assumed, again perhaps incorrectly, that someone who is driving a large truck like that is paid pretty well. The primary reason I didn't tip them was there were two guys, the driver who did all the work plus a helper who did next to nothing. I can't very well tip one but not the other, can I? If there had only been the one guy I probably would have tipped him. Would you still have tipped them even though I was charged for delivery, and if so how much? I had one $10 and several $20 bills in my wallet but to give them each a $20 seemed excessive to me.

One other consideration that puzzles me - does it make any difference if the person owns the business? For some reason I feel uncomfortable tipping a guy who owns the business. For example, I go to a barber shop where the only guy there (the rest of the staff are women) owns the business. I always tip whoever cuts my hair (I'm never sure what it costs because they have senior discounts some days but not others so I usually just give them a $20 bill and tell them to keep the change, which is either $3 or $5) but tipping the owner makes me somewhat uncomfortable. My ATF owns her business but it's in a baauty salon and most of her customers probably assume she's hired help.

As far a strippers go, if I ask a girl to join me and then buy some dances, I don't usually tip unless she's a girl I want to see again. If I don't buy dances I will tip her for her time. If she just joins me without my asking, I'll rarely tip.

FONDL,

I once had a truck of mine detailed. There were two men there, one older and one younger. All the old guy ever did was yell at the younger guy, telling him what to do. The younger fellow did ALL the work. When the job was completed (quite well, I might add), the old fellow came for the money. I gave him the cost of the job. I then asked him (knowing the answer, of course) if it was customary to tip. When he replied in the affirmative and held out his hand, I told him I had already paid him for the detailing. He then said he thought I wished to tip him. I said, no, I wish to tip the fellow that did all the work. The old dude about had a heart attack, while the younger fellow eagerly took the tip. What usually happens and what happened after I left, I've no idea, but I have a pretty good idea.

I've been wondering lately how much to tip the pizza delivery guy. I order from Papa John's and Domino's and they charge a delivery fee ($1.25 and $1.75, respectively) on top of the cost of the items I order. Is the delivery charge instituted to make sure that the driver gets at least something for each delivery? Or does the store keep some (or even all) of it to pay the drivers' hourly wages and for things like liability insurance? (I know someone who owns a sit-down restaurant and she told me that her insurance premiums would be a lot higher if she offered delivery.) Compounding the matter is the fact that until recently one of the local Papa John's stores offered medium and large pizzas for a few bucks less if you picked them up yourself.

Well, when I owned a pizza shop, the delivery fellow was a contractor. He bought the pizza from me and then he kept the delivery charge and the tip. The delivery charge covered his car and the tip, his service. One didn't do so well, the other two did pretty good. I guess not being a wise guy helps.

OK, here's another one. I recently began seeing a chiropractor about a nagging problem I'm having. I've been thinking of doing so (my previous chiropractor hs moved away) when I spotted an ad in our local paper that said "free 60 minute massage for new clients" so I thought I could kill 2 birds with one wallet and see someone I should see anyway and get a free massage in the process. So I did. And I liked the massage, she was pretty good, not great but pretty good. So what would you tip her for a free massage? 20% (LOL)?

Fondl:
What a great deal! You said it was "good, but not great"... However, the price was so good, I think you should've splurged with your tip. Heck, I'd probably have gone as high as 70%... maybe even more!

Of course, I'm sure it was a tame massage... had it been more intimate, not only could you have splurged... you might've splooged, too!

(sorry... I'm in a weird mood this morning)

@ motorhead - The road of the pizza deliveryman is a lonely one. Paved with broken dreams and fraught with danger.

just tip as much as you can.