Platinum is the best club in...

Platinum is the best club in town. I went there as a customer a few weeks ago and had a lot of fun! I spent entirely too much money because so many girls were so awesome on the stages! I got dances from the cute Charlotte since we are friends anyway. I got special treatment! But girls always do dont they?! I don't like the drink prices and I absolutely hate the music and the annoying DJ who yells constantly about mindless crap. Most of the girls are pretty but there seems to be a majority of yuckness going on lately. What's the deal? Platinum now just hire anyone? Can my mom get hired too?! I recommend this club to any pervert.