Frankly, this place is a dump;...

Frankly, this place is a dump; or it was the last time I was here. No, let me rephrase that: what's a word for dump that means an empty bar with a jukebox featuring country, pop and R&B hits you got tired of hearing in the 1990's? A place where surly bartenders serve drinks while a few bored BBWs plead for tips? I'm not sure I have a word. I'm rating it a two because at least there isn't loud music, annoying DJs, or gangstas, but there isn't much of anything, really. Like many small Portland clubs the bartenders double as bouncers, assuming there's anyone to bounce. Some Latino guys and some young weekend party guys, but not very many of anyone. The place is square, which if you speak 1950's slang describes its quality, but I'm referring to topology here. The building is sort of a bungalow. The interior is not well-maintained or cleaned, though I didn't see anything disgusting when I went. Not very well ventilated, but it doesn't matter when there's nobody there.

The ethnicity mix of dancers is the usual for Portland: mostly white with a few stray Latina or Black dancers. The dancers are friendly, and not aggressive hustlers, but they're also far from the best dancers in the world. They're mostly quite overweight -- some of them good looking aside from that, others not. One gets the feeling they're here because they can't make it at another club. Occasionally you'll spot a dancer of quality: they'll tell you what club they usually work at so you can visit them there when they leave. The only reason to go here is if you live, or are staying, in the immediate neighborhood. What puzzles me is how they stay in business -- it's certainly not by selling drinks or dances. Perhaps it's the video poker machines. I'm not inclined to return.