Painfully Depressing, Overtly Exploitative, Desperate Dancers

So some friends were in town for Thanksgiving and we decided to drop by a place that I typically don’t go to unless it’s a last resort/traffic on the freeway/nothing going on anywhere else type of drop in. This was one of those times as my friends were on a stringent budget and wanted something less……ostentatious and expensive. So here we went. Not wanting to be a Debbie Downer, I complied as this is a bargain basement club with bargain basement dancers. Again, it’s kind of like settling for Sizzler or Hometown Buffet over a 5 star restaurant and that’s ok if that’s your standard. Place was fairly packed - tall security guard with shaggy hair patted us down and let us in. Cover was 20 bucks at the door and they let us all in through the turn style.

Not to sound pretentious but this is a backwards baseball cap/football jersey/XXL t shirt type of club. So I stuck out like a sore thumb when I walked in with my Ted Baker turtle neck. My crew split up and I was immediately hassled by the heavy set bartender to open a tab at the bar?? Odd question, why are you asking me to open a tab at a bar that doesn’t sell alcohol and why would I give you a credit card anyways? “To buy these lovely ladies drinks of course”? Let me just say that “Ladies” and “Lovely” are definitely loose terms at this club. Declined and gave her 10 bucks cash for a Red Bull. Already annoyed, I sat in one of the corner benches while my 2 friends were preoccupied with two dancers who were well above 32 on the bmi scale. Not sure why certain dancers insist on not maintaining their appearance in this type of business but touché to them if that’s working for them.

Was immediately approached by a skinny light skinned black girl with tats all over her neck, back, arms, and hands. Definitely not my steelo. Pitched me a 15 minute VIP for 120 as her breath, which smelled like she had gargled with Hennessy, flared my nostrils. Offered me a BJ for 100 - FS for 200. Quickly declined and she opted to continue and sit right next to me while rubbing my knee and intermittently repeating, “are you sure”?. Awkward. Told her I’d tip her some money if she went on stage but she quickly replied that there were 5-6 dancers ahead of her. Finally had to tell her I’d like some space while I enjoyed the stage show. Huffed and puffed and stormed away while mumbling pleasantries under her breath. That was probably the most entertaining thing she had said to me all evening.