A 24K turd

I pulled into Solid Gold around 5 PM. The were more cars in the parking lot than I had seen during my last visits which I took as a good sign. The club is located in the back of an industrial park behind a high wall. Without the GPS or actively looking for the signage, you might not even see it. From the outside, it is an impressive, almost ornate, building.

There was no parking attendant, as there used to be. The door girl did not even look up from her phone to tell me to head inside without cover. The inside is massive, and just the right amount of light. There are bars at either end, with floor tables around long stage with 2-3 poles. There was a couple seated at the far end of the main bar, on the right. There were a pair of guys talking at one floor table, and dancer sitting at another floor table. One dancer. One. I went to the bathrooms first, while she attempted eye contact and said “hello.” I made the mistake of responding with my own “hello”. She mistook my civility for weakness, and moved to intercept me. I zagged further right to the outside of the tables and the temporary refuge of the mens’ room.

When I emerged to reengage, the coast was clear and she was back at her table station watching me like a hawk. I went straight to the bar for domestic non-LGBTQIA+? approved beer. The damage was $4, and the dancer was practically coiled, just waiting for me to get before she struck. The first sip had barely crossed when lips when she introduced herself as Sidney. They body was maybe a high six or low seven. In those evening gowns, it’s hard to tell. The problem was her face was a five. Maybe if she knew how to makeup – foundation, blush, lipstick, eyeshadow, mascara, fake lashed and hair extensions- she could have been attractive. Instead she looked like a single mom on her way to the mall on Sunday afternoon. She gave me the whole rundown that I had not asked for about the club, dances, and room options. I told her from word one that I was not staying longer than it took me to drink the beer, but she persisted until she finished her sales pitch. She went back to her table and allowed me to chug my beer in peace before heading out.