HARD TO JUDGE ON A SLOW NIGHT

Saturday night visit, 7:45-8:30. Free parking, $10 cover, $6.00 bottled water at the bar.

In doing my research prior to my visit to Houston, I notice this club's website says, "We do not allow tank tops or sweats, basketball shorts. You are required to wear a belt, business casual is preferred." My usual strip club habit is to go commando in either shorts or, if it's not warm enough, in what Nike calls jogger sweat pants, which have an elastic waistband and no zippers – and lots of pockets with Velcro closures for keys, phone, wallet, etc. From a distance, they look kinda dressy, but up close they're really soft cotton jersey, which the girls love when they're dancing on me. That night I was in the sweat pants, but I had a pair of Levi's in the car just in case. Anyway, I told you that to tell you this: they didn't give a shit what I was wearing. There was a very friendly, uniformed security guy outside the front door keeping an eye on the lot, and a girl inside taking money. Neither one said anything to me about not having a belt! In fact, the door girl barely looked up from her phone.

At this hour – on a night when the Astros were playing in the World Series in downtown Houston – the club was really slow. There were only about 3 or 4 girls working. I stayed only a short time, and there was always a girl on stage, dancing. From time to time, they shot a fine mist of fog across the stage, which created a fascinating effect from the sophisticated LED lights they have, but damn it, Mr. Club Owner, I'm not there to see a fucking light show – and the fog really interferes with my ability to see the girls! End of rant. Sorry.