The Big Hustle

I wound up with free cover because I'd already paid it at Hoops, the place next door. I checked my coat and went into the main room.

At that point, a semi-cute blonde rushed right over to me and have me the hard sell. And I mean the HARD sell. Saying no didn't work. She tried to pry apart my legs while saying in a heavy accent, "Me give you sexy sexy dance." I said no again, this time a little more sternly but not rudely. She said, "I take that as yes." While that was going on, a waitress stormed over and said, "You but her a drink, yes?" So now I gotta say no to her, too. I'm only in there 10 damn seconds and it's already shakedown time.

After I finally got rid of THAT Dynamic Duo, I was already put off by the place a little bit. But I didn't want to be a big bitch and just walk right out, and I hoped that maybe some of the other dancers would be a little more chill. You know, at least give me your stripper name before you just dive right in, ok? I did meet a few that were a little more laid back, and I got a few dances with a cute brunette named Anna. Dances were ok, she offered VIP for $325. To be honest, I generally only do that if I'm sure extras are in the offing, and I strongly doubted that would be the case.