City of (Hell's) Angels

I finally arrived at the City of Angels after four grueling days of driving across the country. I incentivized myself by only laying over in some of the most popular strip club cities: Atlanta, Dallas-Fort Worth, El Paso, and City of Industry CA; each of which provided happy endings. Long days on the road rewarded by sleepless nights at the club (see previous reviews). Having had little sleep over the greater course of a week, I wasn't wasting any time that night.

It was Saturday night at the end of the month. I suspected everyone at the club had just gotten paid on Friday as well; lots of money to exchange hands in a city where the bumper-to-bumper traffic never dies down. I first tried Deja Vu COI but left after a seriously disappointing roll call and 3-for-1 dance from an aloof spinner. Next, I drove down the street toward Synn COI. The place was equally packed wall-to-wall and the roll call equally forgettable. I started questioning myself, "Does Texas seriously have the hottest strippers in the country?" In my limited experience, it seemed so. At least that night it did.

At this point, it was well after midnight, and I was considering calling it quits, when I rallied and stopped by Paradise Showgirls as it was nearby Synn. I parked in the strip mall and headed inside. Paint on the window advertised "Free Admission," but to my dismay cover was $20. At that point, I realized this place was full of shit. The doorman assured me there were over 30 hot girls inside. Lie number two: I counted the number of spinners there on one hand. On top of that, every five minutes it seemed a waitress asked me to buy one of the dancers a drink. I absolutely hated places like this.