Home Away from Home

There's your vanilla East St. Louis gentlemen's clubs. (Hollywood Show Club and Larry Flint's Hustler Club; I'm looking at you.) Usually young, attractive girls, relatively expensive booze, and two-way contact no frills lap and private dances. Then there's your divey bar type, off the beaten path, "there's only one reason you go to" bars. The women aren't nearly as cosmopolitan. The darkness works to their advantage/people look away kind of girls that other clubs usually shoo away. These are the clubs that give East St. Louis its noteworthy appeal. Wise Guys is the latter of the two. So why would I come here? I'm about to tell you.

I travel to STL far more regularly than any other popular strip club destination on TUSCL (not always by choice, but not complaining, either). That said, I've been to almost all of the strip clubs in the STL metro. I don't consider myself an expert, but I know what I like and what I don't. I like that the turnover is high because you can come in monthly and see fresh faces. So, about this club in particular; here's the scoop on Wise Guys.

I like that the perimeter is fenced off, and the free parking lot is well-lit. Cover that night was seven dollars, which in addition gives you access to the owner's other property across the street, Cheeks. That's two clubs for three fifty each for anyone keeping track. The good liquor and the house stuff cost the same, at ten dollars a pop, so buy what you like. Beer, mostly local domestics, is five. Both the shot and mixed drink I ordered left more to be desired, and the bartender on shift is rather aggressive in asking you to buy drinks for her girls.