I went to Tropical Lei a...

I went to Tropical Lei a few times during the weeknights while I was in the Los Angeles suburbs. The cover charge is $15. The bouncer warns you that you must buy at least one drink every hour. Apparently, they have some way of keeping track. The club is basically one long rectangular room with one main stage. The club is fully nude, so there is no alcohol served. There is only juice, soda, and water. A drink costs an outrageous $6. Okay, I can maybe justify having to pay $6 for a bottle of beer at other clubs, but Tropical Lei is giving you a small glass of soda that is mostly ice. Also, every time a dancer sits down next to you, a waitress is right on top of you, asking if you want to buy the dancer a drink. The prices seemed to be the same when you buy a drink for the dancer, but if you bought ever dancer who approached you a drink, you’d be flat broke.

The dancers were average to above average in the looks department, numerical ratings of 4 through 8. Most of the dancers seemed to be Hispanic. There were a couple Caucasian and Asian dancers too. They would dance on stage for two songs, usually the first topless and the second nude. Usually a couple bucks at the stage would get a nice close-up of the snapper or a Stevie. Lap dances take place on the couches on the ends of the room. It is $20 for a topless dance and $40 for a nude dance. One dancer I would advise to avoid like the plague is a ROB named Amy. She looks like a Gwen Stefani with bigger tits and more ass. She will tell you lap dances cost $30 topless and $60 nude because she is not subject to the prices of the rest of the dancers. She will lie to you to get you into the VIP room then not perform unless you pay her more money than you agreed to before going in. Basically this club is like a service station for PL’s. Extracurriculars are widely available in the curtained VIP rooms. Pricing varies wildly between dancers it seems, but one of the hotter pieces offered me $120 for an oil change and $200 for the works. I believe both of those options were for only a mere three songs. Yikes.

I was reprimanded by a bouncer for taking out my smartphone in the club. I did this while they had no entertainer on stage. (There seemed to be an intermission song between dancers.) If they are going to tell you that you can’t use your phone, at least don’t have an empty stage. The cellphone rule must not apply to dancers because they were allowed to look at their smartphones on the floor. The reason I returned to this club and may return again is because traffic in the Los Angeles area is so bad that it is easier to go to a mediocre club that is close than explore other club that are further away.