I realize the darkness, the lack...

I realize the darkness, the lack of booze, and the (for lack of a better term) overwhelming hillbilly aesthetic might not be to the tastes of some visitors, but I've always had a soft spot for Kuma's. The talent is surprisingly good, and several girls work very hard for the money. Beth is a treat (funny, I can't remember now if that's her real name or her stage name -- long tight blonde curls, shelf you could store the complete works of Tolstoy on, that's her).

The main room is somewhat ramshackle, but the multi-pronged stage (kinda resembles how a baggage carousel loops out, then back in, then out again) means there are plenty of seats with a view. This is not the sort of place where you need to hang back and feign disinterest; no one goes to Kuma's to judge other pervs, just to hoot and holler with them.

The $50-for-20 minutes lap dance deal, tucked away in what can only be called described as a rec room for people who believe ketchup is a vegetable, is well worth the investment. As with most places, some girls are more amenable to a loose interpretation of the rules than others.