I recently had the opportunity to...

I recently had the opportunity to visit the Miami/Fort Lauderdale area, and to visit four different clubs: Solid Gold in Fort Lauderdale, Scarlett's in Hallandale, Dean's Gold in North Miami and Wonderland in Miami. I visited Solid Gold and Scarlett's on a Friday night and Dean's Gold, Wonderland and Scarlett’s on a Saturday night. I am posting separate reviews of each of these four clubs. Each review has this introduction.

I should note some caveats at the start, so anyone reading this can understand the biases and preferences I bring to the table; it is clear from reading various reviews on this site that members of this site have a wide array of preferences, and what floats my boat may be meaningless or even a negative to other members. My personal preferences are simply that -- by having them I do not intend any dispersions to those having very different views. So, here they are: I look for high end gentlemen's clubs (for those who have been around the block as long as I have, the gold standard in my estimation is, or rather was, Ten's in NYC before Giuliani ruined the NYC scene, Cabaret Royale in Dallas in the mid-90s; The Men’s Clubs in Houston and Dallas throughout the 1990s and Paradise Club in Las Vegas from around 1995-2005). Think elegant clubs, beautiful women, in elegant dress and stage performances that, if not always a dance, are something more sexy and enticing than a zombie walk. Mandatory valet parking, high cover and drink charges and high dance fees don't bother me. For me, it's all about the dancers and for me dancing is a young and beautiful woman's game. I am not one to look for what is euphemistically called "extras" inside a club; if I meet a dancer who catches my fancy and wishes to entertain me out side the club, then that might be a different matter. :) For whatever reason, the economy, the IRS tamping down on business expenses, the development of other online entertainment options, whatever it may be, it is hard if not impossible to find a club these days that approaches that gold standard. I hate the Swarming Locusts hi-how-are-you?-are-you-in-town-on-business?-where-are-you-from?-do-you-want-a-dance? ambience that dominates too many clubs that tend to have high quality dancers (examples: Spearmint Rhino in LV; the higher end clubs in NYC). I am often skeptical of the dancer quality ratings on this site. Clubs like Cheetah in Atlanta and Rick's in NYC have nice decor and some attractive dancers -- but top 10 for dancers? Not even close. I keep looking though. :) In there own ways, each of the four South Florida clubs I am reviewing exceeded the norms of today (giving Dean’s Gold a mulligan, for reasons explained in the review of that club).

As to the club's, this review is of Wonderland. I was in on a weekend night, between @10.30 and 12.30 (which, to be fair, is probably a bit early). Wonderland is a bit of a paradox to me: one of the most elegant clubs I have ever seen, with generally very attractive dancers, but there was something strangely low energy about the place; I had a fine time there, but it could have and should have been a great time, and it just wasn't. After waiting a couple hours for it to catch fire, I gave up and left for the happy chaos of Scarlett’s, and had a much better time.