I don't live in Minnesota anymore,...

I don't live in Minnesota anymore, but I grew up in the South Suburbs of Minneapolis and still stay there when I come and visit. I've been to King of Diamonds the last two times I came out, so my repeat business says something about my enjoyment.

Let's start with a big, obvious negative: If you aren't already in the south suburbs, Inver Grove Heights is pretty far away from the center of the MSP area. The giant, well lit parking lot is a nice perk of being so far in the burbs, but it takes a while to get there. The club itself is clean, with two stages and a bunch of tables and padded benches and two bars. The VIP area is small and fairly exposed to the rest of the club. There is zero "thug factor", the DJ is pretty low key, only occasionally encouraging patrons to tip and reminding of dance specials.

Cover was $20 on a Saturday night at 9 PM or so. Not the cheapest to get in, but dances are only $10 and you really only tip the stage dancers if you sit right up on the stage, which can make up for that. Those $10 lap or couch dances are maybe two minutes long. I definitely noticed the DJ was playing short versions of the songs he was playing. Dancers definitely want to get you to buy lap dances, but they also seemed smart enough to know when to move on following a polite no thank you. Like any strip club, the hottest of the hot never circulated in the general club after their stage appearance, presumably being monopolized by a VIP patron paying big bucks.