Synopsis: This is the place...

Synopsis: This is the place to go if you want a rub-down with all the artistry, sensuality, and fantasy of being a car in an automatic car-wash.

Last month I found myself in mid-Florida on a Sunday night. Being a regular reader of TUSCL, I decided that Mons Venus was the place to spend a few hours to relax. So after about an hours drive, I got to Mons Venus just at sunset.

After spending $10 for the cover I went inside. It is smaller than photos and other reviews led me to believe. There is one stage, a jukebox, and some booths way in the back. There were two girls working when I arrived, one blonde with a bad boob job (nipples do NOT normally point straight up to the ceiling when a girl is walking) and a tall, skinny brunette. The blonde was on stage, giving a lot of attention to an older (60s?) guy who was the only other customer I could see. I found a high table and sat down. Moments later, the skinny brunette (completely nude) came over and said "Wanna private dance?" with the same enthusiasm that you hear "want fries with that" at a fast food place.