Stopped by the Spearmint Rhino on...

Stopped by the Spearmint Rhino on a week night after a movie. Not many patrons in the club, which got me a LOT of attention. That was very annoying--the hustle factor was just too great. The club itself is very nice. A couple of bouncers outside will direct you in to the cashier, where you'll pay a cover charge (I think it was 10 GBP) and head downstairs to a lobby with a coat check. Then as you enter the main club you'll see a bar; I always like to get a drink on my own. Expensive, of course; when he asks 15 GBP for a whiskey I ask the bartender how he sleeps at night. He doesn't get my sarcasm. Anyway, the layout: a stage on the other side of the bar, and also in the middle of the large main room. Another bar on the opposite side. Along the right side as you enter you'll find booths for dances; there are VIP rooms elsewhere up and downstairs in the building. The lighting is appropriately dim, the music isn't too awfully loud, and it's a nice club overall.

The girls are generally appetizing. You can always find a really outstanding selection. The trouble is that they tend to choose you rather than vice versa. Trying to move through the club and check things out on your own is like moving through a swarm of gnats. I have been to this club a couple of times during trips to London and it depends on the night; definitely go on a busier evening if you want to at least have a chance to look around and choose on your own. But even then, the hustle factor is high. So be prepared to say no firmly and politely many, many times.

If you find one you like, it can be nice. One of the gnats turned out to be absolutely gorgeous, so I took her for a spin. London dances are rather tame, but you can get a close look and even some slight touching on the legs and maybe the butt. Lots of hard upsell. My advice: play along, but don't actually bite. Despite promises of much better dances, more intimacy, whatever, the VIP dances are actually no different than regular dances (in my experience). But these girls are master saleswomen and are excellent at giving the illusion of connection so that it seems that it could be better in a private setting. But once they have your money, they'll tone it down and even leave in the middle.