I went to Mons Venus on...

I went to Mons Venus on Saturday night. This club is just a few minutes from the Tampa airport. After reading all of the hype on this place, I was surprised to find that it is a small club with a small parking lot. However, the scorching hot looks of most of the dancers inside the building do match the hype. Cover is $20. No alcohol is served: just water, energy drinks, soda, and O’Doul’s. A bottle of water was $2.Stage tipping did not seem to warrant any contact from the dancers, and the stage is high, at about the level of your chest while sitting in a bar chair. Many patrons declined to tip at the stage. The club sometimes has to push to get girls onstage; dancers can make more money on the floor doing less. The lap dances are fully nude and take place along the perimeter of the room on the long booth-style benches. During lap dances, you are permitted to touch everywhere except the snatch. There is little privacy. The price of lap dances was confusing. A sign on the wall stated: “Lap dance price negotiable $20-$30.” Be sure to agree ahead of time with your chosen dancer what the price will be per dance or she will demand $30 apiece afterwards. Also, if girls try to ask you if you are from out of town or local, say you are local. It seems many of the girls will charge tourists $25 or $30 per lap dance. You can get lappers for $20 here if you hold firm on negotiating or lie and say that you got $20 dances here last time (whether you have actually been here or not before). Remember dancers rather get some money than no money. There is no DJ. Dancers select music on a jukebox.

Most of the dancers here were in the 7-10 range. Almost all were white and skinny. You can totally tell what the hiring requirement here is. There was one Hispanic, one Asian, and one black girl. If girls get too fat, they are not allowed to dance until they lose weight. Dancers ages seemed to range from about nineteen to early 30’s. Some of the girls here are easily model quality. The problem some have is that they know they are perfect tens and don’t bother to work hard. Your mileage will vary here. What I am saying is you may get a better grind from the 7 than the 10. This place is so high-tier, the Playboy-caliber girls are pulling a grand easily per shift. The few hundred you throw at that means nothing at this club because they are driving luxury cars and own condos. Enjoy the experience but don’t think you “run the club” with a fat bankroll.

This club grants in-and-out privileges in case you get hungry or want to consume alcohol somewhere else. There is a Wendy’s and a pizza place just south of Mons Venus. I’d come back to Mons Venus if I was in Tampa. It is a fun club, but the jury is out as to whether it is the BEST club in the United States as the Top 100 rankings indicate.