Club Koyote isn't...

Club Koyote isn't the cleanest or classiest of establishments, to put it bluntly. Honestly though, if you see the outside and the surrounding town, how on Earth could you really expect any more? The building is a dive, but the atmosphere is super relaxed and fun. Concrete floors instead of carpeting isn't all that attractive, but it allows you to be more relaxed. You can spill your drink or ashtray without having to worry about the damage done. There's four poles- two on the center stage and two on either side of the bar. Some random mirrors, neon signs, and girly posters make up for the wall decor. VIP room consists of six couches in the back, seperated from the main floor by curtains. Yes, the sofas are all facing each other and it's only semi-private back there, but come on, you get your girl dancing for you and a nice view of the rest of them at the same time... Bathrooms are less than sterile to say the least, but guys don't have to touch anything in there. The girls bathroom isn't quite what we'd like or even close to what we deserve, but essentials like tp, soap, and paper towels are always there or quickly retrieved by one of us dancers for our lady customers. Music's mixed between occasional country, some hip-hop, rap, and rock (and a little metal ^_^) and the sound system is good and loud. Volume's only an issue on some occasions when Denny, our DJ, gets on the mic and either slurs his cheesy lines or calls out the wrong stripper's name. We have one of the most generous bartenders in town, and he's even nicer if you chat him up. Sorry, no beer on tap. No specials, but the prices are more than fair.

What the building is lacking in appearance, our girls more than compensate for. If you have to choose between the only two strip clubs in town, our bar and the trip across the bridge is worth finding a DD because there has not yet been a single man that didn't thoroughly enjoy our number and caliber of women. There's a body type for almost every man. Whatever your preference- thick, slender, busty, athletic, cosmetically enhanced or not- we've got you covered. As far as ethnicity goes, we've got a decent variety. However, we need a woman of the Asian persuasion... All of us are friendly, though some are a little shy at first. Buy 'em a drink and you'll be off to a great start. We don't, however, put up with the grabby guys or extreme belligerents. If you are already puking and stumbling, don't bother coming in. It's a tittie bar. Have fun, but think before you act and behave like an adult please. We'll be more than happy to entertain you, even if it's only conversation for those that just wanna relax. Don't get offended if we don't stay too long. It's only because we do have a job to do, bills to be paid, and plenty of others like yourself wanting the company and entertainment of a beautiful woman.

If I wasn't a dancer at this bar, I'd definitely still be a regular patron and recommend a visit to my buddies if they weren't already coming along with me.