If ever a club was misnamed,...

If ever a club was misnamed, Paradise is it. I read the reviews here before I visited, so I knew not to expect much in the way of decor. I was really okay with that; sometimes you LIKE to feel like you're doing something especially dirty. But I've never been in a club that seemed less concerned about providing a quality experience. I visited Paradise on a Monday, right around noon. On the plus side, I was only charged three bucks to get in. I passed through the door and found myself in a cavernous warehouse space, lit by colored fluoroscent bulbs and some automatically circulating spotlights. There was one customer in the place, seated at the back wall. I took a seat in the middle of the club and looked around. It's a big space, with FIVE stages for dancing...very large stages, too. But nobody was dancing. There was one girl in the place, lying on a couch. She eventually got up and walked over to me, asked my name, blah blah blah, then asked if I wanted to have a good time. I said I'd like to just chill for a bit. She said, "Okay, well, I'm the only girl here." Then she went back to lay on the couch some more. Beside the main stage was a flat panel TV playing hardcore porn, mostly featuring two-girl scenes with strap-ons. I sat for about ten minutes. Nobody danced. Nobody approached me to offer me a drink. Some pretty hardcore rap was playing, the kind that won't be heard on the radio. There was literally nothing going on at all. I know there are private VIP spaces here somewhere, but I didn't get to see them. After a few minutes it became clear that there was no reason to stay unless I just wanted to watch the porn on TV. It was an inexpensive venture, but I will probably never return. I left and headed for the Men's Club, where things were much more pleasant.