Archibalds - Another DC Failure

So a night of a few drinks and some fun with my GF, found me looking for parking on K street to try out one of the "infamous" strip clubs in DC, Archibalds. After driving around,d we finally illegally parked in an alley out back. I kept telling that myself that it would be worth it because this place had to be good. I've hear all about it, and I even knew of the girls that used to work there, and she was hella hot. So we get in, and we are greeted at the door by a bowtie, muscle-bound, ex para-tooper that told us that we couldn't go downstairs. It looked like a good time, wasn't crowded, but there were a good amount of people there. We go to the upstairs, and looked like we walked into a strip club lased with blue lights and depression. there ere about 4 people there, the music was almost inaudible, and the 2 girls that were out looked like they were just biding there time until they were able to watch the next episode of family guy. We went back downstairs and asked Sgt. Nofun to be seated downstairs. the fact that we were dressed like normal people and were clean shaven i guess convinced him to seat us. We walked through the place to almost the back by the last stage. I guess you could say we were fortunate to be seated behind a pole and could barley see the closest stage to us. The middle stage was easier to see, but due to the distance, there was no real connection between you and the girl.

A very attractive waitress cam over and greeted us. She was the only highlight of the night. She had the most personality either of us had experienced in a strip club. She also was probably the only one that acknowledged that we were an "outgoing" couple looking for some fun. She offered us some drinks and we eagerly accepted some lubrication for our palates. When she brought over 2 beers, the 2o dollar price tag came as a shock. I know that we are in DC, but Miller Light is barley worth the $.25 that I paid in undergrad, So I thought i was paying a bit to much, but at this point I needed something to relax me, Cause I could see from skimming the room, that the girls were not capable of it. I felt bad tipping her only 2 bucks, but she stuck around to talk, and get us more over priced beers.

Over the course of the next 30 mins, the conversation between my girlfriend, the cocktail waitress, and myself was interrupted by at least 4 ladies that were working the crowd. 1 person had the audacity to walk over to me, just say thank you and open her garder, expecting a tip. She had not talked to me, I did't notice her dance, and she wasn't even close to attractive. Another one came over sat next to us, and said, she'll be going on stage in 7 mins. (who says 7?) Thinking this was the opening of some convo, we engaged her (she looked like she weighed about 15 lbs when she got of the boat from the poor part of Russia) only to find out she had about as much personality as the over priced warm miller light in my hand.

After a few beers we decided that we were better off going to a college bar for better stripping, more atmosphere, and classier women. Archibalds is a shining example of DC - Failure to please.