discussion comment
17 years ago
I hear that rules are being strictly enforced at all of the clubs in Dallas. I still think BDD is your best bet, but I wouldn't expect much.
discussion comment
17 years ago
Yes, and when you put my perverted spin on it, the line "why you can shampoo the 'rug'" certainly takes on a new meaning. As does "creamed asparagus".
Y'all don't know what a sick dawg I am.
discussion comment
17 years ago
When speaking of ATFs, of course there is only one - the current one, but throughout the years, several favs have ultimately became ATFs of that point in time. Upon reflection, I think the turning point in those relationships that changed their status was when we moved from ITC to OTC.
I suppose, at least in my thinking, the fact that she agrees to hookup OTC implies a certain level of trust and closeness.
More specifically, in answer to your question, I knew my ATF for a very short time before I realized that she was the best - the one that I most enjoyed being with. With her, I spent a total of around 15 SOLID hours talking, playing and getting to know each other before I felt that there was something more than just a hot stripper. If I were to pinpoint the exact moment, I's say it was when we shared our first DFK. I'm telling you, that was THE hottest kiss I've ever had in my life (and I've had quite a bit of experience in that catefory). At that point it was evident that all other dancers that I'd known before her, and since, pale in comparison.
discussion comment
17 years ago
Chandler: Yes, I was amused by the irony of my statement. Until I read your response, I'd forgotten that I'd even typed that phrase. I guess it's easy for me to get carried away talking (typing) and thinking about topics that are "near and dear" to me. Besides, SOMEone has to fill the void created by the absence of BookGuy!
discussion comment
17 years ago
Chandler: Sorry... as usual, I got a little carried away...
David9999: Yeah, it's very similar to "being in love". I'd say that it IS "being in love", but I can't bring myself to saying that. It just sounds too pathetic, and way too early. For sure it's a strong case of "being in lust".
discussion comment
17 years ago
I found a link to some of Kim Kardashian's uncensored sex videos. Here it is... enjoy..
http://www.youporn.com/watch/19081
discussion comment
17 years ago
Great topic... and very profound and enlightening answers.
I think the majority of the reasons that we get so (too?) attached have been mentioned, so I really can't add to much, other than to say why >>I<< have gotten so (too?) attached.
-> you have to start from the beginning. You CHOSE your fav / ATF, picking her over the other girls because she turns you on physically. Personally, I only get dances from girls that I find totally attractive and who has the traits that I desire.
-> the open conversation, and learning about one another makes me feel closer to her. Seeing that vulnerable side turns up the heat another notch. I like taking care of and looking after girls that want / need to be taken care of. (another reason that when we hear to much about SOs it has a negative impact, unless of course he's a jerk that can't or won't take care of her)
-> the way she fills a void. I wouldn't be going to clubs in the first place if I was completely happy with my marriage and wife. There is definitely something lacking there - mostly because we've been together so long that the "spark" is not there. Getting that "butterflies in your stomach" feeling when you see her has not been there for a LONG time, but is WAY strong with my ATF. You get to experience all of those "firsts" again... first kiss, etc. How exciting that can be!
-> ego... you have to admit, it's pretty cool to think to yourself that you are spending time with a stripper, especially OTC. It's an amazing and an ego-stroking experience to walk into a restaurant with her in your arms, seeing other guys take notice of her, then look at you - you can see the envy in their eyes.
-> age difference.. there's 23 years difference between my ATF and myself. Honestly, when we are together, I have never once thought about the age difference. She makes me feel younger, AND she makes me feel like it doesn't matter to her and it doesn't matter to me. Through her, everything seems fresher. There's probably also the element of trying to grab onto the time slipping away. It could be mid-life crisis-esque.
-> attention and playtime... how can you not fall for a pretty girl that showers so much attention on you, and lets you play with her, too (even if you are giving her money for it - directly or indirectly)
-> positive sides ... since we always see only their good sides, what's there not to like. We don't hear the nagging, complaining, etc., from them that we might hear from our SOs. There's an expression that you never know what a person is REALLY like until you've fought with them and lived with them. Since neither one is likely to happen, she remains the princess.
-> when we spend time with them, it's usually in a party-like atmosphere, so good times are being experienced and fun times are had by all. I'm sure there's a Pavlovian thing going on, and we associate our dancer friend with good times. Kind'a like now, when I smell the shampoo that my ATF uses, it's like an instant tent is pitched in the front of my pants.
I think that pretty much sums it up, however I'm not sure where harrydave's "hidden dance" theory comes into play. I guess if I relate it back to the Love Corner at the Hip Hugger, where it's nearly completely dark and thus the dance is hidden... There it's very easy to get addicted to the "hidden dance".
discussion comment
17 years ago
You know, I must be in the minority here. I've rarely been asked that question. Even my ATF doesn't hound me for that information.
Hmm... maybe they don't WANT to see me return!
discussion comment
17 years ago
Not that I enjoy beating the dead horse here, but I did want to take one last stab (geesh, with my word selection there, >>I'M<< starting to creep myself out!).
Whghlost:
I'm glad to see from your last posts that it sounds like you now see the point that we were trying to make. I never said, nor do I think anyone else here suggested that we didn't believe your account of what happened on that Sunday night. I certainly believe it happened as you said it happened; heck, it sounds like MY kind of luck. Most of us agreed that we never thought you were stalking this girl, we were all just pointing out that we could understand how she might feel like she was being stalked.
I also wanted to tell you that I DO understand how you feel, and I know from personal experience, how easily one can form feelings for dancer. (if you've read many of my posts, you will know that I can truthfully say that) Yes, I have my favorite dancers; usually just one that I see on a regular basis and spend a lot of time with as often as possible. Even with her, I am cautious.
Very early on in our "relationship", there was a similar instance where we left the club together (I had walked her to her vehicle - only after asking for her permission to do so), and we both left the parking lot at the same time. We both headed down the same road in the same direction; she was in front. I was very careful to leave plenty of room between our vehicles and to not follow closely. In the back of my mind I worried that she might get the wrong impression of the coincidental driving route. Since it was after 3am and no one else was on the road, it would've been very obvious to her that it was me driving behind her. I was feeling a little uncomfortable because I didn't want to startle her or anything, so I fell further back and was relieved when she finally took her exit. Yes, it was very tempting to catch up to her and honk, wave, flash my lights, etc., but I was careful not to give her any wrong ideas. Had it been just another guy that I'd had some beers with, I might've done one or more of those things... but not with a girl, who would most likely interpret the situation much differently.
Speaking of comfort levels, I wanted to relate this anecdotal incident that demonstrates how you can never assume that a dancer (or anyone) trusts you. After months of spending time with my ATF (the dancer that I've been talking about) ITC (inside the club), I started having an emotional connection with her. I wanted to spend more time with her, preferably OTC, so that we could get to know each other better.
I thought she surely trusted me because we had gotten to know quite a bit about each other. I was always respectful of her. I never tried to press her limits during dances; I never even touched her breasts until she finally placed my hands on them. Without putting any pressure on her, I started suggesting that we go out to eat or something. She was against it. Even though we apparently shared this connection, she still didn't know if she could trust me or not. How could she ever know what I was really like? Even Ted Bundy was clean cut, good looking and very charming, but look at what he was doing?
Finally, she gave in a little and agreed to meet me OTC. We met at a predesignated restaurant and had a great time talking over lunch. She seemed to finally trust me. When I asked her to spend the rest of the afternoon with me, she agreed only after I assured her that my intentions were pure and that I didn't have any false expectations. She told me that she had to return to her vehicle for a few minutes before she could leave. She sat in her vehicle for about 5 min doing something, then she got out, locked it up and crawled into mine and we continued on our merry way.
Later - several MONTHS later - she confessed something to me that I found shocking, and a bit humorous. She told me that when she'd gone to her vehicle before we left, there was something that she had to do. She said at that point in time she was "fairly sure" that I could be trusted, and that I was who I said I was, etc., but just in case, she had left something on the seat of her vehicle.
She'd left a note that said that she had left at [xxxx] date/time, with [my name], that I had [xxxxx] colored hair, was [height and weight], that I was driving a [color, and vehicle model], I was from [city], my cell number was [999-9999], I worked at [employer], my wife and kids names are [xxxxx]. Lastly, my business card was placed on the note. Basically, she had left enough information about me to make sure that if she turned up missing, there was no doubt who was responsible for it. Pretty smart! (also proof of how much she trusted me, and how much she trusted her own intuition)
discussion comment
17 years ago
I think harrydave is onto something (or maybe he is just "on something" [wink]).
I think if there was a "reviewer index" added somewhere on the recent reviews page for each review, it could be yet another tool we can use when perusing the reviews, in order to determine how much validity is placed on the review. It would be purely for informational purposes only.
If a formula, such as ([membership length in years] * [number of reviews]) / 100, would create a number that would be fairly meaningful.
Here are a few examples of what certain reviewer indexes would be;
(PLEASE note, these are just samples, and I am in no way implying anything)
Rev Index
0.071 NikName (recent reviewer of Hot Lap Dance - the club in question)
0.047 rickjohn (recent reviewer of Hot Lap Dance)
0.000 SALVAVIDA (recent reviewer of Hot Lap Dance)
2.322 racejeff (recent reviewer of BBF)
0.052 brianjonessoda (recent reviewer of BBF)
2.694 harrydave (recent reviewer of BBF)
3.441 Bones7599 (recent reviewer of BBF)
2.258 DougS (myself)
discussion comment
17 years ago
Guilt.. Maybe - okay, definitely - I am morally deficient. I SHOULD be filled with guilt when going to the clubs, and doing the things that I do there. I should feel especially guilty for having these pseudo-affairs, affairs of the mind or whatever you want to call them.
Why don't I harbor those guilt feelings? Avoidance? Compartmentalization? Lack of morality? Probably a combination, but another aspect is likely to be the fact that the enjoyment factor is so high that it outweighs everything else.
Sometimes I feel like I live two totally separate lives. When I'm with my ATF, nothing else matters.
discussion comment
17 years ago
http://www.milkandcookies.com/link/66889/detail/
discussion comment
17 years ago
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1772876/
discussion comment
17 years ago
And speaking of careers going in the wrong direction... How about Vanessa Hudgens? She's the talented and serious hottie (though young, and maybe jailbait at the time the pics were taken?) from Disney's High School Musical movies. Revealing pics of hers have recently popped up on the 'net. Here's a link that has a brief summary describing her decent;
http://www.listbums.com/view_profile.php?uid=348&list_id=931
I'm guessing that Disney is not smiling. According to this article (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,296262,00.html), Vanessa, now 18, took the pics "a couple of years ago" and emailed them to Drake (of Nickolodeon's Josh and Drake fame).
Maybe she has stripper potential?!
discussion comment
17 years ago
Founder: In lieu of a tool that could be used to search the discussion topics, how about adding an option to display ALL of the discussion topics? For instance and the bottom of the topics page, you could have the following links; [PREV 25 Topics] [ALL Topics] [NEXT 25 Topics]
I realize - as you all of the other users, that if ALL topics was selected, it's going to take a while to display.
discussion comment
17 years ago
PeMaker: Fortunately, most of us that rely on TUSCL are sharp enough to spot those inflated ratings and reviews that are filled with fluff. I also noticed the new ranking (the trend NA was a great tip off - Founder, way to go on providing us with very helpful tools!), and immediately recognized it for what it is.
discussion comment
17 years ago
WhghLost:
I went back and read your review of the club in question. First, let me apologize for thinking that you were from another country. I got the impression that you were from your post, which read to me like a foreigner was typing due to a few typos and grammar things. Don't get me wrong, I'm certainly not giving you a hard time about that, I just wanted to explain myself.
After reading your review, which incidentally was quite lucid and free of those typos and grammar issues, I see that you are not from a foreign country. My guess is that when you posted this message thread, you were probably typing quite fast and trying to verbalize all of the turmoil that was swirling in your head over this incident. I have done that myself in emails and postings on this board... I get so into my thoughts and typing so quickly that my fingers don't always convey the ideas that seemed so clear in my mind.
Again, please don't take offense..
discussion comment
17 years ago
WhghLost:
I can sympathize with the frustrations that you are feeling, but I also have to side with the majority of the responses. Even though I believe you were not stalking, without intending to, you did give the appearance that you were.
Please forgive me if I'm incorrect, but I also get the impression that perhaps you are from a different country and that there may be a language barrier that has played a role in all of this. It's quite possible that maybe something said was misunderstood due to a difference in language and / or customs.
You have to be cognizant of the dancer's perspective. Maybe she was already feeling that you were putting too much pressure on her for dances at the club before she left. Then upon leaving the club she finds your card on her car (she might've gotten even more nervous to find out that you somehow knew which car was hers). To see you driving next to her and honking - at 2:50am, no less, on a presumably dark and deserted highway... I think that would've made >>ME<< feel uneasy if I'd been in her place.
You also have to keep in mind that dancers are constantly hit on, and more often than you would think, they are stalked and followed on the road. My ATF has told me that she's had a guy follow her all the way to her house (over an hour away). With news of coeds disappearing and bodies being found, you sure cannot blame a girl to be cautious. (actually I was going to say OVERLY cautious, but I don't think that's possible... they should be VERY cautious and diligent in watching out for potentially dangerous situations).
Sooo... like others above have said, my (our) best advice is for you to back off. Forget it. Drop it. Move on. Let things calm down while you visit OTHER clubs. I'm sure word has spread around the club and I would think ALL of the girls there are probably feeling a bit threatened by you, as well, so it's best to avoid going to that club.
Maybe in a month or two - or three - you might test the waters at the same club again. By all means, do not approach your fav dancer unless she first approaches you. In fact, don't even make eye contact. She will probably eventually come around and MAYBE things can be repaired between the two of you.
Good luck!
discussion comment
17 years ago
Yes, that would be EXCELLENT! I find myself wanting to locate past discussion threads and it always becomes tedious. It'd also be nice to be able to search old topics before creating a new topic that's already been discussed. Good idea!!
discussion comment
17 years ago
I would definitely be up for taking my SO (wife) to a strip club. I would most definitely like to watch a dancer with her, and also get "attention" from both of them. Why haven't I ever done that? Well, first and foremost, I don't think she would be receptive to the idea. Yeah, I know, you never know until you ask, but really, I'm pretty sure. The other reason? She knows that I have been to a few clubs in the past (she has no idea the extent to which she is wrong), but she has her idea of what does and does not go on in clubs. If she actually knew how much stuff went on, I'd probably be "in trouble", and I know that I'd be told flat-out that if I went to another club, she'd divorce me.
On the other hand, it'd be interesting to take my ATF to a club (preferably not HER club). That could be quite fun, but I don't think she'd be up for it, either. However, she would be MUCH more inclined than my wife, and there IS still that possibility of doing so, in the future... I might have to bring that up with her [wink].
discussion comment
17 years ago
Fondl: What's wrong about Chandler's statement? Yes, I HAVE heard of professional ballet dancers being told to lose weight... and waitresses and models and yes, strippers. If you own a business and the business is influenced by the looks of your employees, I believe you have every right to ask that they make themselves as presentable as possible. My niece was a Hooters girl for a while, and the manager "suggested" that she get a breast job. It happens.
discussion comment
17 years ago
AngelFly:
The "other SC website" to which I was referring is STRIPCLUBLIST.COM. It can be fairly entertaining and depending on what you are looking for, can be mildly helpful. Of course TUSCL is THE source and is loaded with information and knowledge.
I didn't take your post as being an attack, at all. I am not the least bit misogynistic, though. I am definitely skeptical when it comes to the sincerity of most dancers, though, and keep a keen eye out for scamming. Like I said, I do not blame them... it is their job, and it determines how successful they will be.
Having said that, I don't believe that I've ever been scammed or conned, however, like the theme that keeps repeating on this board implies... how can we ever be sure? I have never caught any of "my girls" in any lies, and believe me I've tried to do so. Some of the stories that my prev-ATF told me were on the far fetched side, and some resulted in a request for money. Bail money, in one case (I guess I should add that to the "Gifts" discussion thread). However, everything added up and pointed to being true.
I guess what I'm rambling on about is that we are bombarded with news articles and web postings describing how PLs have been taken advantage of, so naturally you have to approach the dancers with open eyes - to be used for more than just oogling them. This skepticism causes me to look at everything that goes down (err, no pun intended), analyzing and scrutinizing and otherwise judging whether it's grifting or just another day in the life of a girl forced into dancing for the need of money.
The thing that really sucks about all of this is I THINK my ATF is a very special girl. We seem to have a lot in common and have a great time together (OTC), and I believe there could be something there between her and I, however my skeptic eye keeps hanging in there, trying to find discrepancies in stories, and cultivating doubts in what she professes to be feelings.
discussion comment
17 years ago
Oh yeah, I've remembered a few other gifts that my ATF has received from me.
-> balloon bouquet (she'd mentioned that she'd never received balloons from anyone in her life - not like she was hinting - more like lamenting that her SO isn't very thoughtful - of course I had to show her who IS thoughtful - okay, maybe I was manipulated a little on that one)
-> a Teddy Gram and huge cookie for Valentine's Day
Although it DOES seem a little pathetic and PL-ish to buy dancers gifts, I don't feel at all taken or used by doing so. It makes ME feel good to make her happy. Also, I believe there is a relationship brewing here - it certainly feels like it, anyhow.
discussion comment
17 years ago
I've only experienced "peep booths" once - as I type, I'm still not sure why I never went back.
I had just finished HS, and a group of friends and I went to a local adult bookstore. One of my friends (the more worldly of the group - geesh was I naive back then) mentioned that if one asked for a "shoe shine", for a mere $20 a hot girl would give you a BJ. It all sounded very interesting, but I never planned on partaking.
Once inside the bookstore, after looking at rows and rows of porn tape covers - I'd never seen a porn before, so it was VERY intriguing to say the least. Well, it didn't take me long to head over to the counter and say, "I'm interested in a shoeshine". I immediately felt stupid looking down at my tennis-shoed feet, thinking that I'd been pranked, but apparently the code word was working. (I had no will power, even back then)
I paid the $20 to the cashier, then was ushered to a back room where I could pick from two girls - one surprisingly pretty girl, one not-so-pretty. With decision made, the pretty girl took me by the hand and led me back a dark hallway and into a booth. The booth had a TV screen and a wooden platform shaped like a seat with a coin slot built into the front. She told me that I needed to keep feeding quarters into the slot, which played a porn movie on the screen. After she washed my cock down with a handi-wipe, she proceeded to give me a most wonderful BBBJ, which culminated with CIM. She wasn't happy about the CIM... in fact she was more than a little pissed, but what is a guy to do?! [grin]
discussion comment
17 years ago
Yes, definitely a turn on to watch. Even the tamer version where the dancer rubs herself through the outside of her g-string is hot. Unfortunately, that's been the majority of my viewing pleasure - probably due to the clubs that I frequent.
My prev-ATF used to more than make up for that in OTC.